Advent 2010: Prologue

Millions of years ago, the war between the heroic Autobots and the evil Decepticons engulfed their home world of Cybertron.


The ongoing struggle found its way to the stars and eventually the primitive planet Earth. There the Autobots and Decepticons laid dormant in their crashed spacecraft for four million years. The fighting ceased . . .


. . . until 1984 when a volcanic eruption awoke the Cybertronians and their war. The battlefield: Earth.


In the time since the Cybertronians arrival, new Transformers came on line. This "Second Generation" adopted Earth's customs and came to think of it as their homeworld.


Eventually, the opposing commanders left Earth. Their newest warriors opted to stay behind.


The Autobots left behind thought of themselves as custodians more than warriors. For the first time in their realtively short lives, the were content.


And then . . . .


Pyro: Alright, then. Where the bloody hell am I?


Pyro: Oh, this is not good.

What Tomorrow Holds

I've had 24 hours to decompress from the insanity that was five out-of-town guests, Thanksgiving, and a birthday. The house is a lot quieter with just the three of us. It's especially quiet when the ladies have gone to bed. Daddy can be alone with his thoughts.

That's kind of frightening. I have way too much to do before Christmas this year. It's all self-imposed stuff so I could just pull the plug on any part of it and no one would be overly upset. No one, that is, excepting me.

I declare that my birthday/Christmas present to myself will be the sense of accomplishment that comes with the completion of difficult tasks. Christmas Project '010™ is well underway. I have completed Phase 1 entirely and am now concentrating solely on Phase 2. The Advent Calendar looms on the horizon and I am now regretting not getting a big enough head start.

Deep breaths, penguin_poet. Deep breaths.

Birthday Bash

So . . . tired.

So . . . old.

So . . . musical?

The Hint No One Asked For

The other day I mentioned my Christmas Project '010™. I even offered a wide shot of Phase 2.

Since then, no one has asked for some hints as to what this project is all about. Well, here is a closer look at the actual plans for Phase 2. I hope this quells the hunger for information regarding this massive cultural event.

For now, I'm off to glue and clamp THE LAST DINING ROOM CHAIR!!

Herman Strikes Again

Obviously my sourdough starter is doing reasonably well. Tonight's evidence: pretzels!

Last week it was chocolate chip cookies. Turkey Day may see a baguette. Saturday is begging for pancakes.

This is wonderful stuff!

"Whatcha Dooooooin'?"

Oh, Baby Honey Doll, why must you steal catch phrases from the family favorite cartoon Phineas and Ferb?

Well, to answer your question, I'm putting off posting to the blog so that I can make progress on Christmas Project '010™. (Apologies to Stephen Colbert.) In addition to shopping for Turkey Day, re enforcing two dinning room chairs, and . . . some third thing that would have been an awesome capper; I began Phase 2 of my four-phase project. The initial results lay next to you.

What do you mean you aren't impressed? For a doll that's older than my siblings you have a lot to say about aesthetics, don't you? I may have to send Phoebe's Batman Happy Meal™ toy to teach you some manners.

That's RIGHT your sorry! Now, go to bed.

A BeTaMaXMaS

Do you love '80s nostalgia? How's about Christmas? If you answered yes then have I got the thing for you. (If not, then leave . . . now!)

You have to waste a night at A BeTaMaXMas. Just go. It doesn't need my ham-fisted attempt to describe it. It speaks for itself.

Trust me. You won't regret it.

P.S. - Remember to adjust those rabbit ears!

So Delicious

Blogging can be fun. It's a creative outlet that allows you to connect with others. Some people have struck up great friendships with individuals they met while sharing their ideas on the Internet.

That is why I maintain my comments section and allow anonymous posting. Who knows the interesting people I, or my two readers, could meet?

The down side of anonymous comments is spam. As a former Hormel Foods Corporation employee, I can say actual canned, pre-cooked, spiced ham product would be preferable to what I pick through for your ACTUAL comments. Ew.

This one is special though.

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Wow. Just wow.

Thanks, crewcrime.

Skyping!

Phoeb-a-loo and Aunt E chatted over pancakes and bacon tonight.

Jealous?

My Crafty Friend

After putting the kiddo to bed and a little family visit prep, I've been curling up with a super secret project and a mug o' whine. Tonight the mood was enhanced by Date Night. I recommend it. I recommend ALL of it.

Warning: buzzed blogging IS drunk blogging.

Monday Morning Malaise

This is what my classroom looks like one minute after my ten-minute lesson on decimal/percent conversions. "Just move the decimal point, folks." It's a very easy concept and this group is really on the ball. (Why are they in a remedial math class?)

Looking out on the empty room gave me time to notice just how worn down I am feeling. I need to get some rest. I was very short with Phoebe this weekend. (She's already pretty short to begin with, so how is that fair?) Without the last-minute laundry scramble last night, I wouldn't have accomplished much of anything this weekend. (Thanks for the assist Mthr. M-G!)

The trouble is the house is a mess and we have company coming Saturday. When am I going to have time to get myself right so that Phoeb-a-loo and Mthr. M-G don't have to tip-toe around the bear all week?

That is why I missed three days of posts.

Thank You

To the brave men and women of the United States armed forces:

Happy Veteran's Day!

#046 - Mystery Package

Bomb-Burst: Submarauder! Today is the day penguin_poet is to receive his . . . item. Go and intercept it and bring it back here!


Submarauder: We're all Decepticon Pretenders. Why do I have to go?


Bomb-Burst: First of all, I've got bat wings on my epaulettes which makes me awesome. Second, Skullgrin over there has trouble with two-step instructions. Also, you're the water themed member of our trio. You're like Aquaman. That means you suck.


Submarauder: Okay, I'm going.

Bomb-Burst: Also, I checked the tech specs. I OUTRANK both of you!


Some time later . . . .

Submarauder: Do you know how fragging heavy that thing is?

Skullgrin: Aroo?


Bomb-Burst: The return address tells me nothing. We'll have to open it. SKULLGRIN, get your feet off of it!

Skullgrin: Rorr-ree . . . .


Bomb-Burst: It's a good thing we all came with swords.

Submarauder: Who knew advanced robotic beings would ever need melee weapons?


Bomb-Burst: Alright. Skullgrin, you go play with the empty bag.

Skullgrin: Hehehehe . . . .

Bomb-Burst: Now what do we have here?


Submarauder: Looks like a loyalty program reward from Nintendo™.

Bomb-Burst: That's right! penguin_poet did buy himself a Wii with the money he got selling off some of his Transformers at BotCon this year.

Submarauder: It makes me sick to think of it.


Bomb-Burst: We shall present this 2011 page-a-day calendar to Megatron as tribute.

Submarauder: Agreed!

Skullgrin: Breauuuugh!


Submarauder: And what of this mini year-at-a-glance calendar?

Bomb-Burst: That will adorn my work area, of course.


Skullgrin: Nuh-uh!

Potential Incarnate

What could be waiting for me at the post office?

My guess: giant novelty check for one million dollars.

Tune in tomorrow for the big reveal!

The Jabberwocky

’Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

“Beware the Jabberwock, my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!”

He took his vorpal sword in hand:
Long time the manxome foe he sought—
So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
And stood awhile in thought.

And as in uffish thought he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!

One, two! One, two! and through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.

“And hast thou slain the Jabberwock?
Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!”
He chortled in his joy.

’Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.

--Lewis Carroll

Zombies Are the New Vampires

At least tweens haven't taken over this horror genre.

Also, Walking Dead on AMC is cool.

Daylight Saving Time Ends

It's time for our clocks to agree with the sun again!

What's better than an extra hour of sleep? (Thank you, Benjamin Franklin.) Going to bed an hour early and getting two extra hours of sleep. (Thank you, Mthr. M-G.)

By the way, it's Daylight Saving Time not Daylight Savings Time. Don't make me angry. You wouldn't like me when I'm angry.

Movie Madness

The whole family is in pajamas. The popcorn is hot and buttery. It's Movie Night!

FREE BOARD GAME!!!

Tracy and Laura Hickman are giving away preview copies of their board game Santa's Sleigh Ride as a free download. Go to reindeergamer.com/ to get it. A color printer, card stock, and tape will be needed to bring the game to life, but that's not asking too much is it?

If you like the game, you have the opportunity to buy the full version. It comes with expanded rules, more printable components, and (drum roll) a full-color game board shipped to you. The first one hundred game boards will be autographed by the creators.

You may know the Hickmans as the authors of the Dungeons & Dragons: Dragonlance series of novels. I got Tracy's Xtreme Dungeon Mastery as a Christmas present last year. It is a wonderful guide to becoming a great role-playing game officiant.

This is not the Hickmans' first foray into direct-from-creator distribution either. Earlier this year they set up dragonsbard.com as a way of selling subscriptions to their novel in progress. Subscribers (like me) got to read each chapter of their novel, Dragon's Bard: Eventide as it was being written through weekly postings to a password secured site. Subscribers could comment in the site's forums, discuss the process with the authors, and even make copy edits. (I caught a few typos myself that will be corrected for the print version.) Not only do you get to take part in this behind-the-scenes experience in publishing. Subscribers also receive a signed and numbered limited first printing of the hardcover book.

Eventide's subscriptions are now closed, but you can still get a copy of the book. Better yet they've announced that the second book in the trilogy will be available for subscription early next year.

To sum up, Tracy and Laura Hickman are amazingly creative people finding new was to get their ideas to their audience. Show them some love!

Let's All Take a Breath

"This is far from over."

I've seen those words or words expressing the same sentiment several times today. I understand that. No one likes being on the losing side of any competition.

I witnessed a lot of smug attitudes. That's also understandable. The taste of victory may be the sweetest of all.

I saw a lot of people today living their lives like nothing has changed. Truth be told, as long as we--as a nation--cannot learn to work together, nothing WILL change. The people fighting one another for the chance to speechify in Washington don't do it for us. They do it for themselves. As long as they can set the extremists against each other those of us in the middle will be too distracted to see that nothing really changes.

As I've said before, I'm striving to overcome my pessimism. As I look to the future, I can't shake the sickening feeling that . . .

This is far from over.

Going Back to the Begining

After officiating the first two seasons of Wizards of the Coast's Dungeons & Dragons: Encounters, I've come to a conclusion. D&D was better 30 years ago.

The current incarnation of the game, 4th Edition, is an attempt to make table a top role-playing game into something more appealing to massively multi-player online gaming fans. Nearly all combat abstraction has been removed in favor of miniature positioning. Challenges that could once be improvisationalll acted out to a satisfactory conclusion are now resolved by rolling dice. So the original role-playing game no longer has its participants playing roles.

I admit that I bought in to 4th Edition . . . for a long time. As a player, I wanted to keep up with a supported system so that I could drop into a game no matter where Monkey-Girl and I ended up. I enjoyed D&D 3.5 and trusted Wizards to update their game well. I forgot Wizards didn't create D&D.

I'm reading Gary Gygax's Advanced Dungeons & Dragons: Player's Handbook from 1978. (Notice the lack of edition numbering.) My experience has shown that if I'm going to participate in a D&D game I'll be the one running the game. Why get frustrated with how far the game has strayed from its roots when I can just stick to the roots?

Also, I don't have to worry about keeping up with latest rules releases. I can head to a used book store and pick up all the supplements there will ever be for less than $10 a book.

Feather Time

I made the decision to not participate in NaNoWriMo this year. The last third of November will just be too crazy to exercise the discipline needed to finish a novel.

That doesn't mean November will be devoid of creativity. Why just tonight the three of us worked on this year's Thanksgiving Turkey Feather. Like last year's this is a family project displaying what Phoebe is thankful for.

We have:

• Kai-Lan - Phoebe and Momma's earliest favorite cartoon.
  
• Pizza and a Piano - Phoebe and Momma's Thursday night activities while Daddy was off playing D&D.
  
• Abby Cadabby - the cutest little fairy goddaughter on Sesame Street. (Daddy may like her more than Phoebe does.)
  
• Perry the Platypus - Phineas and Ferb's pet and secret agent. This show is our new animated obsession. (See Phoebe's costume below.)
  
• Optimus Prime - the only Transformer Phoebe recognizes. It doesn't hurt that Daddy has given her two different toy incarnations of this character. (Don't tell her, but she's the heiress of another three dozen or so Primes.)
  

There will be more creativity to come. I plan on posting each day in November in anticipation of Advent 2010. (WHAT!)