Home for the Holidays

Well, holiday actually, but lets not get too technical.

Monkey-Girl and I drove up to Wisconsin on Friday. Along the way, we picked up our friend, Sean. Much fog was enjoyed by all. We ate at the Yardarm Bar and Grill in Racine (have it!) with some of my clan.

Saturday we attended/participated in a friend's ordination to the Deaconate. (That is correct. I don't care what spell check says.) I must say it was very nice to get a preview of what Monkey-Girl will be doing in another year. I kept thinking, "I'll get to hold the baby during this!" I'm excited.

Above is an example of my previously teased contribution to my school's holiday decor. It's a picture created from a set of points listed as ordered pairs and plotted on a coordinate plane. Here's another. I like them because they make me feel like I may have some artistic talent. (I don't.) The books in the series are called Cartesian Cartoons or some variant of that and are excellent for supplementing an algebra lesson.

Tonight we go to our home parish's Christmas service. It will be great to see everyone again. I've been joyful since we crossed the Wisconsin-Illinois border. (Even if the Packers tanked.) It's wonderful to be home!

Technical Difficulties

Sorry. I had quite the head of steam built up there for awhile. It was my intention to update this blog each day through year's end and possibly beyond. Well, reality stepped in and put the kibosh on that. My laptop died again. To compound the issue, I can't find our camera.

I've decided that in spite of these setbacks I will attempt an update. Here it goes:

Today is the last full day of school before Winter Break. (Your titles have to be secular when you're in a public school.) The kids are crazed. The teachers are manic. All is well with the world. The halls and class rooms are decked out in festive regalia. (I too was able to contribute, but more on that later.)

My favorite decoration, unfortunately, has to be described in words. (Again, no camera.) There is a strand of garland arcing over our heads in one hallway with signs hanging from it. The signs read, "Have a Holley Jolley Christmas!" Now before you go hanging your head in shame at the decline of the American education system, let me explain.

Kathryn Holley, our art teacher, is the occupant of the room to the left of the previously mentioned garland. Likewise, Roger Jolley, social studies, is the teacher on its right side. So, in fact, its a clever decoration. Yay!

X-Stitch for X-Mas

This is the coolest Christmas decoration ever! It combines the cheesiness of a Star Wars photo montage, superimposed holiday clip art, and counted cross stitch.

Some enterprising eBay personality has ignored copyright law in order to create this cross stitch chart. The modern-day pirate is asking for $10 with shipping.

I know I ought to be morally opposed to this, but it's just too uber-ridiculous to resist. I do have some birthday cash left. I'll sleep on it.

Happy hundredth post, y'all!

Serendipity

I was racking my brain to come up with a picture to write about for today's post. I really didn't have anything to say. I guessed updating the blog every day was a little too ambitious. I was content to break my streak and just finish my book.

Then I looked behind me. Mercutio has the right idea. It's late fall. The days are still getting shorter. The semester is coming to an end. Lots of paperwork is coming due. In short, the stress is on. It's time to find a buddy to snuggle with!

Mercutio's buddy is a recently acquired family member, Vibo, the vibrating monkey. I bought Vibo for Monkey-Girl when she was just starting to experience the aches and pains of being pregnant. He's nice to lean against when your back is hurting and you can leave him out when not in use. He's too cute to put away.

I think God wanted to get the message out. Self-care and companionship are a must right now.

Get too it!

Mr. Jones, You've Let Me Down

The Jones Soda Company made a name for themselves by creating ridiculous flavors for carbonated beverages. The Thanksgiving Holiday Pack -- sporting such flavors as turkey and gravy, green bean casserole, mashed potatoes -- put them on the map.

Since then they've made an effort to legitimize themselves with more sane offerings. Cream soda, green apple, and berry lemonade can now be found in Wal-Mart's soda aisle.
Besides being more accessible, Jones is trying to be more healthy. Their sodas are made with pure cane sugar. No high-fructose corn syrup here. Those trying to be nice to their bodies will be happy for that.

Wanting to be a healthier daddy, I sought out one of my favorite varieties of soft drink: root beer. Having found the Jones version of said nectar, I have this to report . . . eh.

For me, all root beers can be divided into two distinct camps: sweet and spicy. Sweet can be best summed up by its representative A&W. Its title says it all -- that is -- not much. Spicy, on the other hand, is an acquired taste I'll admit. Once acquired however, a world of flavor will be opened unto the brave taster. Spicy, you are my muse!

Jones, you are no spicy.

As for me, I will trust in my faithful IBC root beer. Poor, poor liver.

Too Much Fun to Bake

I've got to take the time to do some Christmas baking. These guys look fun and delicious (a double threat,) and I want to make some. I've baked within the last week. (Chocolate covered cheesecake bites anyone?) That's not the issue. I just have a need to bake something you should only bake in December. Now I feel like I'm racing the clock to the 25th.

It's my own fault that I haven't had the time to do this sort of thing. I chose to drive up to Murfreesboro to play Dungeons & Dragons today. I played Heroscape yesterday. (I'm such a geek.) I just wish that there was more time in the day. Who doesn't?

I vow to make some gingerbread men this week. You are my witnesses. I will make the time. (I never just stumble upon some extra time.) If you don't read about my gingerbread exploits by next Sunday call me on it.

The clock is ticking . . . .

Famous Fog Finally Falls

The campus we live on is a meteorological oddity. (It is to me at least, but I'm no meteorologist.) We're on a plateau and yet, come fall, we experience this crazy dense fog while the valley is crystal clear.

Today was the first time we experienced the white-knuckled, oh-my-God-we're-all-going-to-die-driving-down-the-mountain, fog. Yet, once I drove off the Domain, there was nearly limitless visibility. An hour later, back on the Domain, the fog was as thick as ever.

Today was a good day to stay indoors and play Heroscape for six hours at a go. Which I did.

For those of you that care, Guy the Chia Guy is doing well. As you can see his "hair" is coming in nicely. I expect he will have a full and glorious coat by Christmas

43 Years Young

Yesterday marked the anniversary of the 1964 debut of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer on NBC. (It was later moved to CBS.) The holiday special produced by Rankin/Bass is the longest running show of its type. It is a personal favorite of mine and one of the few programs I've purchased in both VHS and DVD formats.

Two of its stars, Santa and the titular Rudolph, were recently restored to their original glory. It seems that the puppets were saved from the Japanese animation studio's dumpster by a Rankin/Bass employee and gifted to a family with young children. The two were used as toys for several years before becoming holiday decorations. Rudolf was actually kept in a candy dish near the end of his decorating tenure. Due to the abuse these two took over the years, they were retired to the attic for being unattractive.

In 2005, the two puppets were purchased by a toy collector. The collector hired an artist to restore the pair. The above photo was taken after a recent unveiling. One would be hard pressed to find evidence of the stain on Santa's face, the mold under his beard, or his two broken legs. The poor guy was even missing half his mustache. Rudolf fared no better better than his jolly friend. The cloven-hooved wonder had a broken neck and couldn't hold his head up. His trademark nose had been lost and replaced with Play-Doh and candle wax.

The restorer commented that the job was very rewarding and stressful. She felt she was holding her own childhood in her hands as she worked. The worst part for her was having to behead Ruddy in order to replace a control wire in his neck.

By the looks of it, she's done a wonderful job. My inner 5-year-old approves.

Calendar Defender

My guy Optimus is keeping vigil. He's making sure no one lays a finger on my Advent calendar. The German chocolaty goodness is mine. All mine, you hear!?!

Oh, Optimus? I keep him in delicious energon. He's more than grateful. He's built for defense. He lives for situations like this. That and if he did complain, he knows I'd put him back in storage with the other transformers.

That's all I got for tonight, folks. It was Survivor night at our friends' house and it's late.

I'm putting up a new entry every day now. They can't all be winners.

Samurai X Sudoku

Has the sudoku fad died out yet?

I don't care. I enjoy it. As a math teacher, I'm almost obligated to. Here's a bit of professional insight. There's very little math involved in solving a sudoku puzzle. Sure there's logic, a valuable mathematics tool, but certainly not enough actual mathematics to justify Shanghaiing math classrooms across America. Numbers are just symbols being used to hold places in the puzzle. You can use letters, shapes, colors . . . anything!

In spite of that, I still like it as a personal distraction. I just don't subject my students to it.

Now for the rules:
1) Use the digits 1 through 9 to fill in every cell of the puzzle.
2) Each digit may only be used once in each row, column, nine-box-square, and diagonal within each colored area.
3) Some colored areas do overlap.
4) There is only one unique solution.
5) The puzzle can be solved using only logic. No guessing required.

Dare you face the dreaded Samurai X?

Forgive Me

Monkey-Girl and I have fallen into an odd Yuletide tradition. We've happened to see nearly every installment of The Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. This year we actually decided to see the show instead of something else. (Check out Tin Man on Sci-Fi!)

The show doesn't just feature women in their underwear. There are always musical performances. This year features the debut of the Spice Girls reunion. I suppose my sarcastic prayers have been answered.

So far, this show has been quite tame compared to my recollections. The first year, they had to cut away from the models as they walked back from the runway. The ladies were revealing too much "ga-dunk" in their thongs I guess. I'm seeing a lot of capes and bikinis this year.

Sorry this is so short. Ms. Klum calls.

No One Bid On This!

This is the weirdest/coolest Star Wars collectible ever. It features a festive Darth Vader in all his evil glory complete with a wreath/stand for display purposes. I can't believe I missed this thing coming out. Perhaps because it was a Star Wars Shop exclusive . . .

Regardless, have you ever seen anything so beautifully trashy? That crazy red makes you want to taste this guy just to see if it's peppermint or cinnamon flavored. The plastic wreath for him to stand on that looks like it was picked up at a Woolworth's on December 26th. It's perfect.

Ebay currently has over half-a-dozen of these nuggets of wonder up for auction. I'm very, very tempted.

Candles Aren't Just for Chanukah

Today is the First Sunday of Advent. "Christmas Time is Here," says the Vince Giraldi song. It's time for bringing yard trimmings into your home and bringing decorations outside. As Episcopalians, Monkey-Girl and I like to light candles in greenery to signify the passage of time during Advent. As we're not getting a tree this year, I thought we needed a wreath. Here's ours. It comes complete with color coded candles!

Not wanting to do completely without a tree, I smuggled this bad boy out of the nursery. Charlie Brown would be quite proud. Can you believe the sincerity oozing out of this guy? Now that is a tree to be proud of!

Speaking of Guy, here he is. Chia Guy is now sporting goo! He should be sprouting in a couple of days.

Belated Birthday - Chia Style!

I am of the generation that grew up watching the Chia Pet commercial played in a seemingly constant loop during commercial breaks from Batman the camp-tacular 60s television show. The theme was drilled into my head. "Ch-ch-ch-Chia!" When it came time to spend some of my birthday money it seemed only logical to track down this bit of nostalgia.

Surprisingly enough, I had to go to two different drug stores to find this thing. The first had the full line of licensed Chia products; Chia Homer Simpson, Chia Garfield, Chia Elmer Fudd, etc. As cool as that was, I wasn't going to settle for anything less than a Chia original. At the second store I entered I found a similar selection to the first. Unsatisfied, I dug through the display until I found, in the back, this little item. Behold! Chia Guy!! (The large letters at the top of the package may read Chia Head, but at the very bottom you can see his real name.)

I've begun the crucial yet boring process of preparing the pottery. The head itself must soak for twenty-four hours before the actual fun begins. If you click on the picture at the left, you'll see a larger image of Chia Guy. (Named, I'm sure, for my uncle.) His scalp immediately reminded me or Marvel Comic's own Norman Osborn. Also, you'll notice Guy is typical of most french men with his large nose.


I'm really looking forward to tomorrow at one o'clock. Then I get to slather Guy's stripey head with this seed goo. The seeds too must prep for twenty-four hours. (How convenient!) They're already starting to look like the raspberry jam I put on Monkey-Girl's pb&j this afternoon.




I'll keep you all informed as to Chia Guy's progress. (I know you're all rivited.) He should have a full, luxurious, head of alfalfa by Christmas.